October 20

Freedom To Choose

 
"Enforced morality lacks the power that comes to us when we choose to live a spiritual life."

Basic Text, p. 44

In our active addiction, many of us lived our lives by default. We were unwilling or unable to make choices about how we wanted to act, what we preferred to do, or even where we would live. We allowed the drugs or other people to make our most basic decisions for us. Freedom from active addiction means, among other things, the freedom to make those choices for ourselves.

Freedom of choice is a wonderful gift, but it's also a great responsibility. Choice allows us to find out who we are and what we believe in. However, in exercising it, we're called on to weigh our own choices and accept the consequences. This leads some of us to seek out someone who will make our choices for us-our sponsor, our home group, our NA friends-just as our disease made our choices for us when we were using. That's not recovery.

Seeking others' experience is one thing; abdicating personal responsibility is something else. If we don't use the gift of freedom we've been given, if we refuse to accept the responsibilities that go along with it, we'll lose that gift and our lives will be diminished. We are responsible for our own recovery and our own choices. Difficult as it may seem; we must make those choices for ourselves and become willing to accept the consequences.

Just for today:  I am grateful for the freedom to live as I choose. Today, I will accept responsibility for my recovery, make my own choices, and accept the consequences.

Just for Today (Revised) - pg. 306
Copyright © 1991 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

October 17

The Truth

"Everything we know is subject to revision, especially what we know about the truth."

Basic Text, p.94

Many of us thought we could recognize "The Truth." We believed the truth was one thing, certain and unchanging, which we could grasp easily and without question. The real truth, however, was that we often couldn't see the truth if it hit us square in the face. Our disease colored everything in our lives, especially our perception of the truth-in fact, what we "knew" about the truth nearly killed us. Before we could begin to recognize truth, we had to switch our allegiance from our addiction to a Higher Power, the source of all that is good and true.

The truth has changed as our faith in a Higher Power has grown. As we've worked the steps, our entire lives have begun to change through the healing power of the principles of recovery. In order to open the door for that change, we have had to surrender our attachment to an unchanging and rigid truth.

The truth becomes purer and simpler each time we encounter it. And just as the steps work in our lives every day-if we allow them-our understanding of the truth may change each day as we grow.

Just for today: I will open my eyes and my heart to changes brought about by the steps. With an open mind, I can understand the truth in my life today.

Just for Today (Revised) - pg. 304
Copyright © 1991 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

October 19

Standing for something

"...we could feel time, touch reality, and recognize spiritual values long lost to many of us."

Basic Text, p.88

In our active addiction, we were prepared to compromise everything we believed in just to get our hands on more drugs. Whether we stole from our families and friends, sold ourselves, or lied to our employers, we were ignoring the values that mattered most to us. Each time we compromised another dearly held belief, another chunk of the mortar holding our characters together fell away. By the time many of us came to our first meeting, nothing was left but the ruin of our former selves.

We will locate our lost values as we carry out our first honest self-examination. But in order to rebuild our characters, we'll find it necessary to maintain those values, no matter how great the temptation to shove them aside. We will need to be honest, even when we think we could fool everyone by lying. If we ignore our values, we'll discover that the biggest fibs we've told have been the ones we've told ourselves.

We don't want to start the demolition of our spirits again after all the work we've put into their restoration. It's essential that we stand for something, or we risk falling for anything. Whatever we find important to us, we honor.

Just for today: I stand for something. My strength is the result of living my values.

Just for Today (Revised) - pg. 305
Copyright © 1991 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved.

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